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Jean Briese's avatar

Oh man, I'm brand new at this and so far most of these have eluded me, well if you don't count the last 10 years where I wrote one or two chapters every once in a while and then told myself, "Who am I kidding?" Maybe it's because I moved near the ocean and life has slowed down, but I'm getting the chapters written and have a process that makes it happen first thing every day- it's a habit. but, the one that I am hopelessly lost in, I am writing the chapters as they come to me, not in serial order. Although there are chapters who follow a timeline. Like some books I read, my story bops back and forth in the timeline. Ugh... it's a thing now. Hope it doesn't keep me from finishing!

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Hi Jean, That's great that it's flowing for you and you have a process that's working! I've read some books that jump back and forth and it really can work! I'm definitely not saying it can't. My timeline is chronological and I noticed that when I can force myself to stick to the order, I make more continuous progress and have a lot less rework. But that's just me! Every person's process is different.

Do you have any tips on how you have made it such a firm habit?

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Jean Briese's avatar

Thanks so much for the thoughtful reply! I totally get what you’re saying—sticking to a chronological timeline definitely has its advantages.

A few things have helped me make it a steady habit:

I mapped out a loose publishing calendar with suggested titles to keep me on track.

I write early in the morning before my family is up. It’s quiet, and I’ve made it cozy—soft music, dim lighting, favorite scent in the diffuser, and coffee in my favorite mug. I aim for 30 minutes, but sometimes I go longer.

Even though my story jumps around in time, I realized each thread still follows its own sequence. That’s made it much easier to keep moving forward—it’s not as random as I once thought!

I love how different everyone’s process is. It’s fun to share and learn from each other. 💛

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Andi Penner's avatar

How not to finish? Be overly worried about doing it "right." Gets you little and keeps you spinning.

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Truth!!

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Michelle Nicolaysen's avatar

So relatable, all of them, except writing a substack post about writing a memoir, but give me some time! Most recently #2 is the one I've been wrestling with. When I first started this process, I took a memoir writing class, and in every damn post I made, the teacher would comment, "What's your arc? I don't see it." I finally posted that I have to write my way into it, which I know is my process. To which she came back with, okay, but I still don't see your arc. I didn't bother to finish the class. I know that's something that comes with editing, but recently, every time I sit down to write, I've been talking to myself like I'm that teacher. It's absolutely killing my process.

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Jelaine Lombardi's avatar

Great article. All so true. Mine would be #4. Find so many things that need to be done first, this has also kept me from attending zoom group lately 😩 and now I have a puppy! At least I did just publish my latest Substack about him Lol

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

#12 Getting a puppy. 😂

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Tamy Faierman M.D.'s avatar

Loved every word! Gotta go write ✍️ after reading that , I have nowhere left to hide 😂

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Yes!!! Do it! ❤️

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Tamy Faierman M.D.'s avatar

Guilty as charged! Love this piece because there is no way to hide lol

You see me. You are me.

And in that, I get to see myself more clearly.

I’m in the messy middle of my memoir, halfway through towards my first draft. It’s no picnic. And I love it! Thank you for this most vulnerable and real article, I loved it! Gotta go now, got some writing to attend to lol 😂

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Thanks for the sweet message, Tamy! For your sake, I wish it didn't resonate so much, but I'm so happy to hear that it motivated you to write! ❤️

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Tamy Faierman M.D.'s avatar

haha me2! 🙂💫

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Annamaria's avatar

You nailed it! I can totally relate…

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Claire Randall's avatar

Thanks for this Christina, l am still at the beginning and having similar reflections and knowing how to start! Feeling confident and at least l know what to look out for. Really appreciate your time and guidance xxx💜

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Thanks Claire! ❤️❤️❤️

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Nutan Jaeger's avatar

I feel like I've been exceedingly good at numbers 1, 4, 6, and 9! Don't worry, you'll get there!

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Haha! Yes, the struggle is real! Thanks for the encouragement. I'm excited for what comes next for you! Can't wait to read your memoir!

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Jo Roberts's avatar

Oh my, I think you’ve just described my memoir writing journey 😆. I loved reading this 💕

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

I'm sorry! 😂

Glad you enjoyed it!

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Jo Roberts's avatar

😆✨💕

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Jessica Plante-Curl's avatar

🤣💖🐦‍⬛

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Jean Rhude's avatar

Yes, yes to all and in the years of process I've changed and how can my words be authentic if they don't reflect the current me when I so need to be the absolute truth?

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

But is there an absolute truth? I totally feel you on how hard it is to reenter a story and decide what angle to take when yesterday's "you" isn't the same person you are today.

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Jane Mundy's avatar

Wow, I totally relate and am guilty of every reason to postpone. Love 9: Wonder who you think you are and whether your story is even worth telling. As a former travel writer, I'm totally spoilt. My line is, "Don't you know who I think I am?" Thanks for this!

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Lisa Brunette's avatar

Furiously write 99,000 words like your life depends on it, because it does, and then grind to a screeching halt when you get a few chapters away from the end, terrified to bring it all to a close.

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Memoir Mentors's avatar

Oh god... I feel this one, too. Do you ever wonder, "Who will I be when I finish writing this?" Then there's also the fear of all the not so fun stuff that comes next. Publishing, marketing, etc...

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Lisa Brunette's avatar

Or if you even will share it with the public!

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